Wednesday, November 26, 2008
There should be an actual update (actually a few) on the new blog within a couple days, so stay tuned.
Once again the new blog is www.cajunsblog.com
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Cajun is a time traveler/was abducted by Aliens.
So Tenmagnet has been staying on my couch the past couple weeks because he just moved back to Toronto from Vancouver and doesnt have a place yet. A couple weeks ago, me, Tenmagnet, and Biscuit (whom im sure you will be hearing more about as he competed in the next season of Keys to the VIP), all went out for food after a successful Toronto bootcamp. After the meal, as we were walking back to my place, Tenmagnet and Biscuit realized they had no towels to shower and decided to go purchase some. We were already directly across the street from my house and waiting for the light when they realized this. I told them there was a drug mart a block away down the street. They went off to the drug mart as I stood there waiting for the light to turn so I could go across the street into my house.
Good, so far.
So the light turns a couple seconds later, I walk across the street and open my door (it was mysteriously unlocked?) and walk up my stairs into my house. I go into my living room and see Tenmagnet and Biscuit sitting on my couch using their laptops!
Cajun: What the FUCK!?
Cajun: How did you guys beat me here? I just saw you walk in the OPPOSITE direction towards the drug mart??
Tenmagnet: Dude, we got back like 3 minutes ago...
Cajun: What!? Impossible, I just left you guys across the street!
Biscuit: That was like 10 minutes ago dude, the drug mart didnt have towels so we had to go to the other place down the street.
Cajun:...Haha you guys are fucking with me!
Tenmagnet: Dude...look, we have the towels.
*They have gay pink towels that are obviously not mine*
Cajun: Oh fuck!
Tenmagnet: What the fuck is wrong with you?
Cajun: Shit, I think I skipped time, im so fucked!
Biscuit: You probably got into a trance or something.
Cajun: Did you guys see me standing outside when you came back?
Tenmagnet: No, hmmm we would have though. Where the fuck were you?
Cajun: No! You guys went to the store, I crossed the street, came inside and you were already here!
Tenmagnet: You probably got abducted by aliens.
Cajun: Alright, were not talking about this anymore, this is freaking me out, lets get drunk.
*An hour later my roommate/cousin Mitch comes home*
*Tenmag and Biscuit tell him the story*
Mitch: Haha yeah that happens to him all the time, he's so fucked, he disappears sometimes.
Cajun: Shut up! Stop talking about this!
Haha so im still not sure what happened, but recently in Glasgow I disappeared and actually REMEMBER where I went.
Cajun disappears in Scotland
We were drinking in this cool underground basement bar with a group of people, Cajun gets up to go to the washroom and never comes back. A while later, im back at the hotel room and Cajun bursts in the door out of breath, dirt all over him, and bloody hands. What the fuck?
So I went to the washroom to take a piss and actually wasn't feeling that well. When I came out of the washroom I noticed a door with a green exit sign which I thought was the door we came in from. I wanted to get some fresh air so I opened it and walked out, immediately an alarm goes off and I realize im in the back area behind the bar and am entirely fenced in with 20 foot concrete walls. I go back to the door to get back inside but it only opens from the inside and is now closed and locked. Fuck! I bang on the door for about 5 minutes but its too loud inside and nobody hears it. I laugh to myself for getting into the predicament and decide to look around for possible escapes.
Im basically in a totally concealed concrete box outside the bar with two fire escapes leading up to doors. I climb the first one and get to the door at the top which is locked. Fuck. I climb up the second one and the door is also locked. Im getting upset and desperate at this point. While on the second ladder I notice that its high enough that I could scale the concrete wall. I initially think this is a terrible idea since even if I do scale it, the drop on the other side would no doubt bust my ankles or leg or something. I look for something soft to land on, nothing, but I realize that on the other side is a tall bar gate that I think I could squeeze under to get to freedom, worth a shot I think if I can manage a way down there. I lean out and see if I can see anything on the other side of the concrete wall that I could use to shimmy down, I notice a solid looking pipe, victory! I also realize that if I jump from the fire escape onto the wall that there would be no way back onto the fire escape unless I pull some serious Jackie Chan shit, and im totally wasted so thats almost certain death.
I decide to jump, I make it onto the top of the wall and almost fall off head first but manage to steady myself. I hold onto the wall with my hands and try to get a footing onto the pipe. Its pretty stable so I let go of the wall with my hands and hold on, I slide a bit and a screw rips my hand open as I slide down the first few feet. Fuck! It doesnt hurt too bad because im drunk. I manage to get down the other side and my feet hit the ground, fuck yeah! I look at my hand, its not too bad. I go over to the bar fence and realize that I could never crawl under it or through it, going over it isnt an option either as its too high and all the bars are vertical and hard to climb, especially for a drunk idiot like me. I get mad again, it seems I'm now even more fucked. Its about 3am and theres nobody on the tiny side street this fence overlooks. I freak out and start running around looking for exits, I walk down a dark little alley that comes to a door that opens. Thing is, inside is totally pitch dark and I have no idea if theres a way out...
I decide that things couldn't get much worse so I go in and the door closes behind me, its pitch black, I cant see anything. I go to open the door again to let some light in but its ALSO a door that only opens from 1 side, and since I didn't hold it open, its now locked. FUCK, I'm now locked in a dark room with no foreseeable exit. I start getting very upset and screaming at the Gods for putting me through this. I decide to pad around the walls with my hands to see if I can find anything, I touch something with buttons so I push them all and it makes beeps and buzzes like an apartment buzzer, I yell into what I presume is a mic and continually mash the buttons, but nothing. After about 10 minutes of padding around I finally feel a bar that I can push, I push it and a door opens and I'm outside on the street! I triumphantly yell "FREEEEEDOM" in front of a bunch of people outside the club looking at me like I'm some sort of crazy hobo. I'm full of dirt, wearing a bright red Michael Jackson jacket and covered in blood. I run back to the hotel, burst open the door and see Tenmagnet using his laptop and looking at me like he's seen a ghost.
Tenmagnet: You are so fucked.
Cajun: I know.
Tenmagnet: Tell me what happened...
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Just wanted to announce that we're changing things up for our talk that we're giving in Glasgow.
We're going to be getting a really sweet room at Arta on Albion Street, with a bartender and a sound system as well. But because of that, we're going to have to ask for ten pounds, to cover the cost of the room and everything. Icedragon from the Scotland Lair is helping us organize this, and will be collecting the cover.
This is the first time we've charged for one of our lair talks, and it's also the first time we've actually gotten a pimped-out place to give the talk in, so I'm looking forward to it. We'll see if the audience is cool with paying a modest fee for a slightly nicer venue.
As always, Tenmagnet and I are going to be giving 95% content, and 5% plugging our upcoming Glasgow bootcamp, and the Lovesystems Superconference. I'm going to talk about inner game, and Tenmagnet will be talking about phone game and how to prevent flaking, which is one of his specialties. The guys at our last talk and Dublin all said they got a heck of a lot out of our presentation, and this one should be every bit as good.
So here are the details:
When: Thursday the 2nd of October, drinks and networking at 7pm, presentation starts at 8pm.
Where: Arta, 62 Albion Street, Merchant City, Glasgow
Who: Tenmagnet and Cajun, swashbuckling Canadian pickup arists guys.
Looking forward to seeing you all there!
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Guy: Cajun, whats your mindframe when going out to meet women?
Cajun: Well, I don't actually go out with the specific intention of meeting women, but if I was to verbalize my mindframe it would be: To have drinks with my friends and fuck with people, this also happens to be conducive to meeting women.
A perfect example of this happened last night when we were out with students at one of the touristy bars here in Dublin. Before I explain the story, I should let you all know that sometimes I try to convince people that I speak like 10 different languages, I obviously don't, but I know a few random things to say in a number of languages. The phrases I know are usually ridiculous, for instance in Italian I know how to say "My fingers are stuck together!" (La mi dita sono insieme!) which I usually scream while holding my hands in the air like a stereotypical Italian and "Get the fuck out of here asshole!" (Catzo vai via stronzo!) which I say to girls when they tell me they speak Italian. At the bar last night I ended up meeting a German girl, so I decided to fuck with her a bit.
Girl: Yes im German.
Cajun: Sprechen ze Deutsch?
Cajun: Ahhh ish va sergoot, ya?
Girl: Ya (excitedly says something in German that I dont understand)
Cajun: Ya! Scheizer auf mein en kindern!
Girl:....(bursts out laughing) You just said "shit on my children!"
Cajun: I know exactly what I said!
Girl: Why would you say that?
Cajun: Because im German...and I sprechen it.
Girl: You are not German, you make no sense.
Cajun: Oh dont play coy with me, I know all about you Germans and your love of shitting on things, especially my children.
Girl: You are crazy! (laughing)
Cajun: (to other germans) Guys this girl wanted me to tell you to "Scheizer auf meinen kindern"
*They give me weird looks*
Girl: Nooooo ahhhh!
She grabs me and buries her face into me playfully.
Haha the students got a kick out of this one and I thought you guys might too.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
I just arrived in Dublin this morning, and wanted to make sure everyone knew that Tenmagnet and I are going to be giving a FREE 1hr talk in both Dublin and Glasgow as part of our European tour.
Big thanks to the guys in the Irish Crew who helped arrange this!
The talk in Dublin will be at Trinity College’s GMB building, at 8pm on Thursday the 25th. I don’t have the actual street address and room number, but I’ll update this post when I have everything down. You can find a map of Trinity College here.
The talk in Glasgow is still being organized, but it will almost certainly be at 7-8pm on Thursday Oct 2nd. Keep checking back to this post for the details.
Also, Tenmagnet and I are going to be in Ireland and the UK for the better part of the next month, traveling from town to town as tourists in between our bootcamps, and we’re going to be giving away FREE PICKUP ADVICE in exchange for beer.
So if you see one of these turkeys in a bar, buy them a drink and collect your free words of wisdom (quality NOT guaranteed, especially after 11pm).
Also, in the meantime checkout lovesystems' (formerly Mystery Method corp) new youtube channel for some free pickup game videos!
Friday, September 19, 2008
So I was talking to my little cousin the other day and he was telling me how he was going through all these little movies I made when I was a kid. See, back in the 90's when I was a kid me and my friends used to make movies that revolved around things we thought were funny, thing is, I had (and still do) a really fucked up sense of humour.
Anyways, he found a video me and my cousin (his older brother) made when we were 15-16 and thought it was hilarious, so he uploaded it to youtube. The video is a movie I made for a valentine's day school assembly in high school and its basically a dating how-to video hosted by two pedophiles....yes you read that correctly. I got in a lot of trouble for this video and it pretty much cemented me and Mitch (yes the same one from the keys video) as the "weird funny guys" in high school. Take a gander! Oh and keep in mind that this is from like 1998.
Dwayne & Uncle Teddy on dating
Its no wonder that whenever I see people from high school and they ask what I do, they burst out laughing when I tell them "dating coach".
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Well guess what? I got that mother fucker neutered! I also managed to attract one of the vets at the clinic, so theres more to this article than me bragging about how I destroyed my cat's confidence, let me explain...
So it started off with a call to the vet clinic, its a small neighborhood one with 1 or 2 vets who also tend to answer the phone. Cute sounding girl picks up.
Kelly: Vet clinic, Kelly speaking.
Cajun: Hey Kelly, whats up?
Kelly: Not much, how can I help you?
Cajun: Well, I'm calling because I need to get Rod Stewart's balls destroyed.
Kelly: .....(explosive laughter, muffles phone)
Cajun: Don't laugh, he's been biting me all day...
Kelly: Rod Stewart is your cat I take it?
Cajun: Yeah, but I only named him that to embarrass him.
We talk for a bit and set up an appointment. I take him in a few days later to get a check-up to see if hes fit for surgery. When I come in I see that Kelly is actually young and HOT.
Kelly: Ahh so this is the infamous Rod Stewart, what a cutie!
*She begins scratching his chin, he makes a stupid noise that he probably thinks is cute.*
Cajun: Do you always butter them up before before ripping their balls of?
Kelly: Oh man, story of my life.
Cajun: Ah ha, vet humour, I love it.
Kelly: Yeah, Ive heard them all.
Cajun: I made a whole list of double-entendres I could use that are vet related before I came...just in case.
Kelly: Haha, smart thinking.
*She starts examining Rod*
Kelly: Is he aggressive?
Cajun: Yeah, he's an asshole, but a charming one, like me.
Kelly: What do you do when he misbehaves?
Cajun: Well I was squirting him with water and vinnegar, but now he seems to like that, so i've been experimenting with public embarassment.
Kelly: Haha how does that work?
Cajun: Well, I invite my friends over and we watch a video I took of him eating lettuce out of the garbage, then we all point and laugh at him. He gets really embarrassed, he doesn't want people to know he secretly enjoys lettuce.
Kelly: ......Ahahaha I can't even tell if you're being serious or not.
Cajun: Yeah, well if you have any ideas, I used to throw him in the shower when he was really bad but now he seems to like that too. He always whines when I have a shower, and I end up bringing him in.
Kelly: You shower with your cat?
Cajun: Yeah, he's fucked up.
Kelly: Haha my cat fell into the tub when I was bathing once, that will never happen again.
Cajun: You have a cat? I bet you totally put sweaters on him.
Kelly: Ahhhh no!
Cajun: So you're telling me that if I walk over to your desk I wont find a picture of a cat with a sweater on?
Kelly: Ahhh noooo its not mine!
*she touches me as she laughs. Rod, most likely upset that me and the vet are getting along, decides to bite me*
Cajun: Ahhh fuck!
Kelly: Haha he IS a dick!
Cajun: See! Totally unprovoked!
*Kelly examines his eyes*
Kelly: Are his eyes always watery like that?
Cajun: Yeah, hes a baby, he's always crying.
Kelly: No no, it looks like he may have herpes.
Kelly: It's cat herpes, don't worry, you can't catch it, and its not that big of a deal.
Cajun: Oh my god this is the best news i've heard all day! How fitting that Rod Stewart has herpes! Could I get an official document that confirms that? I'll frame it with a picture of him looking really sad.
Kelly: Ahahaha unfortunately not, you guys have quite the love hate relationship don't you?
Cajun: Lets just say that him getting neutered is a big victory for me.
Kelly: He's gonna be really out of it afterwards, be nice.
Cajun: How does it work anyway? I was picturing like a giant mallet and you smash them as hard as you can?
Kelly: Hahahaha no, its just a small incision in the back of his testicles.
Cajun: Do you think you could play a song as you do it?
Cajun: I was thinking that if you play the song "Rhythm of my heart" by Rod Stewart as you neuter him that maybe he will link the song to ball destruction every time he hears it and I could use that to my advantage.
Kelly: As much as I would love to go along with that experiment, it wont do much, he'll be out of it the whole time.
Cajun: Ahh ok, I thought it would be a cool party trick...
Kelly finishes up and we set an appointment for the following week. I was thinking of going for her number as I didn't notice a ring on her finger, but I noticed pics on her desk of her and a dude, and someone called her while I was there and it sounded like a boyfriend conversation so I decided to play it cool for now. The funny thing is that I always end up attracting women by saying the stupidest things, I believe its mostly due to the fact that I tend to say things for my own amusement regardless of what other people may think.
The next week I brought Rod in and he said good bye to his boys. I made sure to berate him the whole week to really revel in the fact that I was finally getting back at him for all the cockblocks he had dished out to me in the past. You fuck with my balls, I fuck with yours!
He came home all doped up and was walking into walls and shit, and kept licking his dick in front of everyone like it was some sort of show. He seemed really embarrassed in general though. Chalk up another win for CAJUN, that righteous asshole!
Ill try to get another article up before next week, when im off to Ireland and Scotland for a few weeks. Theres still a few seats left for the bootcamps, so sign up now if you're interested before we sell out.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Anyways, in this situation I told my student to use the moustache opener because he told me he was thinking of growing one anyways. Of course I offered to demo the opener so he could see that it worked, thing is, I hate using routines so I always try to improvise stupid things into them to see if I can make fun of the girls and also handicap myself. I spotted 4 cute girls at a table and walked over.
Cajun: Hey what do you guys think about moustaches?
Girl1: They're gross...
Cajun: No I mean on guys though..
Girl3: Are you growing a moustache?
Cajun: Yeah, me and my friends are, for charity.
Girl4: What charity?
Cajun:.....the Burt Reynolds foundation for testicular cancer.
Girl4: What? Does he even have testicular cancer.
Cajun: (dead serious) No he has something called "cheddar cock"
Girl2: WHAT! hahahahah!
Cajun: Don't laugh, thats just the slang name, its apparently really serious, he might die.
Girl1: What is it?
Cajun: Well...its like these little orange mushrooms grow all over his foreskin.
Cajun: Yeah and apparently they taste like cheddar hence the slang name.
Girl2: (between fits of laughter) How do you know what they taste like!?
Cajun: I don't, he just posted that on his blog.
Girl1: Who did?
Cajun: Burt Reynolds...
Girl 2 is pretty much crying laughing right now, girl 1 (ugly) looks pissed, and the other 2 seem to believe what im saying.
Girl3: How do you get charity for growing a moustache?
Cajun: Well I grow it then donate it.
Girl4: Donate the moustache...
Cajun: (trying as hard as I can to appear dead serious) Yeah, you know guys who get chemotherapy, all their hair falls out, so I grow a moustache for them, donate it, and then they stick it on their lip with some scotch tape or something and then nobody knows they have cancer.
Girl4: You might be the most fucked up person i've ever met.
Girl2: I love him, he's hillarious! Drink with us!
Cajun: I should go make sure my friends are having fun without me, ill be right back...
Hahahah I love doing shit like this. Anyways, girl2 was a singer in a rock band and pretty hot, I ended up getting her number later on. My student still thinks im insane.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Why is it so great?
- Simply knowing this routine alone will most likely double the amount of women in your life.
- It can be used in the bar, or on a date and can last over 2 hours easily.
- If used on a date it will eliminate any and all awkward silences because of the way its played.
- It creates immense attraction effortlessly.
- If used properly, and in its entirety it leads to intimacy 80% of the time... im not kidding.
Its no wonder that most of my students cite this routine as one of the major highlights of my bootcamps, often claiming down the road that it alone was worth the price of the bootcamp.
So why am I teasing you with all this?
Well, a couple reasons. First of all on October 17th we are having our semi-annual super-conference in LA where I will be presenting this routine publicly for the first time. For those of you who missed the last super conference in Vegas earlier this year its pretty much a who's who of all the major players in the pua scene. Ill be presenting this routine on the main stage for the better part of an hour as well as covering body language in the breakout room, which is essentially a classroom where we do exercises and activities.
Secondly, if you cant make it to LA, me and Tenmagnet will be in Europe before the super conference doing bootcamps in Dublin and Glasgow. These will be our only European bootcamps for quite some time so if you're European and want to learn this insane routine, amongst many other things, this may be your last chance for a while.
Anyways, if you have already learned this routine from me, feel free to leave a comment explaining the success you've had with it.
For those of you who wish to sign up for either the super conference or my bootcamps, go to www.lovesystems.com
Monday, August 25, 2008
So im back home in New Brunswick, which is why I havnt been posting, ive been too busy getting into trouble and being righteous. Anyways, my vacation is done this thursday when I fly out to Vancouver to help my good buddy Tenmagnet with a seminar. This will be the last time me and Tenmagnet do a Canadian city together for quite some time, we're headed to Europe in September and after that we have the super conference in LA.
Its pretty much an honour and a privilege to have me and Tenmagnet working your seminar together (haha I love saying that, im such an arrogant asshole), if you think im good, then remember that Tenmagnet was my teacher. As well, understand that which instructor you choose for your bootcamp changes the seminar experience quite significantly as we all have our specialties. Having both me and Tenmag means that you're getting double the specialties. This may be one of your only chances to learn from the grand masters of: Body language, subtext, phone game, natural game, inner game, improvisation, and humour. Of course, we still teach everything from starting a conversation to getting her back to your bed, and everything in between, so don't worry, if you have a sticking point, we'll cover it.
Anyways, if you're on the west coast and you've been thinking of going to a seminar, this would be the one.
Ill be posting regularly next week, so stay tuned.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
"How did you first come across the PUA community? First as a "student", and now as an instructor?"
"This is an interesting but long story. My friend had sent me a copy of some David DeAngelo material around 2004. I started reading it and was impressed that someone had actually tried to logically explain what you need to do in order to attract a woman. DeAngelo's stuff opened my eyes to the idea of "working" at becoming a "natural" but I was in a relationship at the time and didn't think too much about it.
About a year later that relationship ended and I became interested in "dating science" again, I was at a friend's house and noticed this book on his couch that looked like a bible, it was of course "The Game" and I ended up borrowing it from him and read the whole thing that night. The entire time I was reading it I was thinking "Holy shit! all that these guys are doing is acting!" I was heavily into acting and improv at the time, and I considered myself talented at it, so to hear that there were guys going around using scripted lines and picking up Britney Spears made me VERY jealous.
I went out the very next night intent on proving to myself that I could use the same lines just as good if not better than the guys in the game. The funny thing is that that night paved the path that I would lead for the next 3 years. I ended up doing very well that night, my friends thought I was posessed. On the way home I met these two girls from Paris on the bus and ended up getting their phone numbers, and as I was getting off the bus a guy came up to me and said that what I did on the bus was awesome. His name was Sasha and I told him about this book I read and we started talking, he ended up living like a block away from me, so we walked home together. After explaining to him that I was working on a system to attract women he mentioned that I reminded him of an old friend named Erik who he used to hang out with in Toronto. I jokingly asked him if Erik was a magician (since I knew Mystery's real name was Erik) and he exclaimed "Yes he is! Do you know him?" Turns out Sasha used to hang out with Mystery back before any of the events in the game happened. I explained the book to him and he was shocked, not knowing what Erik had been up to since he last saw him a couple years earlier. We agreed to meet again the next day so I could show him the book.
Me and Sasha ended up becoming good friends and we both decided that we wanted in on the whole dating science thing. For the next 4 months we went out nearly EVERY night to practice our game. We would write all our own routines and share information on bits of paper like two students studying for a test, it was a lot of fun. We started to become known as two of the better guys in the Toronto community since we'd often share advice to other guys we'd meet while we were out, and it always got them results.
So after about 5 months of this hardcore sarging Sasha gets a call from Mystery who is in town and wants to see him again. We were already out so we both head over to the bar where he's at and I get to meet him, Matador, Lovedrop, Tenmagnet as well as a couple of the other instructors at the time. I try to convince them that I would be a great addition to their company but none of them seemed that interested. Mystery did end up giving me some good advice on how to deal with a playboy model I was dating at the time though!
So, two months later I'm back at the same bar (lone-wolfing since Sasha had moved back to Europe at this point) and who should I see but Tenmagnet! One of the instructors I had met with Mystery that night. He was talking to some beautiful women and unfortunately I didn't remember him and accidentally began trying to steal the girls away from him. He just sat there and watched and listened to what I was doing, observing me. After the girls started flirting with me Tenmagnet congratulated me and told me that he worked for Mystery and that what I just did was really impressive. I remembered him from before and we ended up talking for a while and he convinced me to come to his seminar a couple weeks later. I went to the seminar and showed him my stuff in the field and he was impressed enough to invite me to help him out on his next seminar, in fact he still maintains that I was the best student he's ever had hehe. Anyways, I ended up becoming really good friends with Tenmagnet since we both lived in Toronto and he kept inviting me to help out until I finally became an instructor with the company a couple months later.
So that brings us to today! Tenmagnet and myself now work for Lovesystems, which is the reformed mystery method, and the leading seduction school in the world and Sasha is one of the top dating coaches in Europe currently working on Project: Rockstar. What a happy ending!"
Sasha's and Tenmagnet's blogs are linked under my friends tab, check them out!
Saturday, July 26, 2008
I act sometimes for my friend's videos and commercials. Here's a couple.
Grasshopper Beer commercial
Pepsi Access Commercial
Thought pulse commercial
Coin Laundry - Short film I won some acting awards from.
Phone trap is my favourite, we filmed it in Japan. I basically just acted like an idiot in a phone booth for 8 hours.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
They were rejected of course...
Aries- You know Darryl came over to my house once and he said “Dwayne, sometimes you gotta give a little bit and take a little bit, and its your turn to take it” I was never quite sure what he meant at the moment, but I think you will be experiencing a lot of that today.
Gemini- Sometimes when you look at a child, the most pleasurable feeling comes over you, and you think of all the pleasurable things you could do with that child…if it were yours. But today you have to remember that the blonde haired child seemingly by himself is not your child, and that as much as you wish, children cannot be loaned.
Capricorn- Today you will experience understanding. Understanding is a powerful tool, for instance the other day uncle Teddy got drunk and vomited in the dryer. At first I realized that these things happen, but it wasn’t until Uncle Teddy turned the dryer on that I realized the notion of “Understanding” can often be stretched a little too far.
Pisces- Sometimes its hard when someone doesn’t understand you. Also, someone is hard sometimes when it doesn’t understand you. You see what I did there? When you mix around words, sometimes the meaning changes. Keep that in mind today.
Cancer- sometimes you have to make a choice. Yesterday I had to make several choices, one of them was what to have for supper; white meat or dark meat. Of course I picked Calvin. Remember to make the right choice today.
Virgo- Relationships can be a hard thing, especially when you have more than one. Which one should you choose? Dwayne or Stephen? In this case you should pick Dwayne because Stephen is a known sex offender.
Leo- Today you will have to make a hard decision, which is frustrating sometimes. For instance the decision I had yesterday on the parking garage of "What target?" was a hard one. Now that example is out of context but it still gets my point across.
Aquarius- Being able to define a situation is one of your strong points, although keep in mind that your definitions will not always be the same as other people’s. For instance my definition of the word “underage” may differ from yours.
Scorpio- Being in an uncomfortable situation can sometimes be really painful. But whenever I have someone in a “compromising” situation I always let them relax by telling them to just “sit back and let the good times roll”. Let people relax today.
Sagittarius- Remember to use the right words when describing people today. For instance, describing your new friend who watches you “from afar” as “Salty” or “Moist” are not common words used for describing people and may cause confusion. However “Menacing” and “rapist” are both words that many people understand.
Taurus- Sometimes people ask stupid questions, like “What’s that hole for?” Now I know what your thinking, “that’s a little vague!” But the fact is I don’t really know what that hole IS for and I’m not mentioning which one it is until I find out. Be prepared to find out today.
Libra- You should try not to blurt out personal questions today like “what does tradition sound like” Because the answer is different for everyone, for me its kicking a small dog.
I'll be writing a few posts this week (I promise!) I just got back from Las Vegas, where ive been for the past 2 weeks, so I'll pump a few more pieces out before I head back to work again this weekend.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Tenmagnet and I have been talking about doing a bootcamp in Rio de Janeiro for quite some time, and we've finally decided to go for it. We've looked into flights and have booked a hotel near Copacabana beach, and we're all set for an english-language bootcamp August 29th-31st in Brazil's most awesome city.
This bootcamp is not a sure thing yet - because of the distances and costs involved, we have to sell a certain number of advanced seats before we can guarantee that the bootcamp will go forward. For that reason, we're not putting it up on the website just yet.
Anyone interested in signing up should call 323.836.0150 (I think our toll-free number may not work from Brazil). This may likely be the ONLY Lovesystems seminar EVER in Brazil, so sign up now!
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
"It's funny, when people call me short the first thing that pops in my mind is "Wtf is he/she talking about? I'm not short at all." I don't believe that im short, and it hardly ever comes up as a problem.
I'm about 5'6 -5'7 in my bare feet. So im taller than a lot of girls, but im also shorter than a lot of them too. Most of the girls I end up dating are taller than me, and my height isn't something that gets brought up too much. Why is that? Because its not an issue for me. During my last bootcamp in Toronto, some of my students got to see how I deal with girls when they bring up my height, in this case it was a very tall blonde (over 6 feet) who probably has a nasty habit of tooling guys. Went like this:
Tall blonde: You're really short.
Cajun: Ooooh am I?
*I lean against bar to put the physical dynamic back in my favour*
Tall blonde: Yeah, I'm way taller than you.
*I smile and look at her waiting for her to say something else. She doesn't break*
Cajun: (Very slowly) Why don't you come over here and tell me some more things that you like about me.
Tall blonde: Haha, you'd like that wouldn't you shorty?
*Realizing that this girl may just be the type that gets off on tooling and rejecting guys, I decide to throw some massive DHVs to see if I can turn her around"
Cajun: Oh wait, my friends put you up to this didn't they?
Tall blonde: Put me up to what?
Cajun: Oh nevermind, its a little personal... (baiting)
Tall blonde: Tell me. (She FINALLY comes closer)
Cajun: Well, my friends are always making fun of me because I tend to date tall women, and I recently broke up with my ex, so I figured since you're the tallest girl in the bar that maybe they talked you into coming over and making fun of me.
*Tall blonde comes closer*
Tall blonde: No, they didn't, but why do you date tall girls?
Cajun: Oh I don't know, they're just the ones that I tend to date.
*I put emphasis on the word "date" implying that I see lots of women, and that the tall ones are the only ones that I actually end up dating."
Cajun: You're actually shorter than my ex, you kind of look like her though, you're not brazilian are you?
Tall blonde: Haha no, im Portugese.
Cajun: And you're not an actress?
Tall blonde: No.
Cajun: Good, then I can keep talking to you.
*Tall blonde shifts from "tooling me" to "blatantly hitting on me" so quickly that I can hear the collective "Wtf how did he do that?" from my students 10 feet away.*
It was easy from that point on. The trick is to let them know that height is not an issue for you, or the girls that you date. You can communicate this usually by simply being confident, however in some cases, like mine, you have to subtly hint at it using DHV stories. The stuff I said was actually true too, and I ended up dating THIS girl for a little while."
I'll have a few more posts coming over the next few days, including another entry involving that shit head Rod Stewart.
Friday, May 23, 2008
The past few days I've been thinking about my life at this point. I have a pretty sweet lifestyle, at least on the surface, you could easily compare it to a rock star, in fact I'd say that my life is even crazier than most rock stars. Anyways, for my birthday I asked my friends to give me quotes I could use to get an idea of who I am. Just their own impressions of the type of guy I am, or maybe crazy shit they have witnessed. I told them to give it a "roasting" type of vibe, so the quotes tend to be hilariously negative. I figured that odds are I won't remember a lot of this when I get older, so it would at least be fun to look back on it and laugh.
Usually when fucked up things happen to me I don't realize how fucked up they are until other people tell me, reading over this list I got a little identity crisis, because it doesn't sound like me at all, yet, it is.
One of my best friends/drinking buddy/co-worker; Tenmagnet, summed it up pretty well:
"Dude, our lives are like a Charles Bukowski novel, nobody would believe us..."
Who is Cajun?
"His diet seems to consist of beef jerky and whatever garnishes come with his drinks. Seriously, I don't understand how he's still alive, his diet is that of a 15th century sailor"
"Pretty much has a death wish, he's the only guy I know who will actively pick fights with guys 3 times his size, easily out drink everyone, and get hit by cars on a near weekly basis."
"He once told a woman he was the devil...she believed him"
"If you take the worst parts of Errol Flynn, Oliver Reed, and Jim Morrison you will pretty much have him."
"He's definitely an asshole, but a very likable one."
"The only guy I know who dresses like an evil Michael Jackson and doesn't get beat up on a consistent basis."
"Hanging out with him is like being in a movie, like some sort of twisted Buster Keaton porno thriller"
and my favourite...
"I came over to his house early one morning to get my cell phone and found him passed out on his couch, soaked in piss, with 2 naked girls beside him. Upon waking, he ate some crackers off the floor, took a shot of whiskey from a flask and whispered "good morning" with a sly smile. Good morning indeed!"
Feel free to leave a happy b-day comment, or if you've hung out with me before you can add your own quote to my list.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
I just finished watching this old rat pack movie on TV, I think it was called "They come running" or something. Anyways, it always fun to watch some old school seducers work their game, in this case Sinatra and Dean Martin. These guys are so fucking bad ass.
All the rat pack films usually revolve around the same shit, Sinatra (whose character is usually ALSO named Frank) & friends drink a lot, smoke, gamble, fuck girls, beat guys up and just be awesome in general. I was flicking through the channels and this is the first scene that came up.
- Sinatra wakes up in bed with a young Shirley McClain, presumably after fucking the shit out of her all night. He lights a cigarette and walks into the living room to find Dean Martin drinking straight whiskey and playing cards. They proceed to have a conversation about gambling, drinking, smoking and steak.
Cajun: HOLY FUCK! This movie is amazing!
I decide to watch the rest, and to be honest the story was pretty fucked up, even for the fifties. I imagined how a conversation about the plot of this movie would have been brought up in conversation, then I thought of the Limo driver from Spinal Tap:
Limo Driver: Oh you may be good with women, but you're no Frank, I mean that guy really deserved respect.
Cajun: Why is that?
Limo driver: Because Frank knows, I mean he's loved and he's lost, he knows.
Cajun: What do you mean?
Limo Driver: Have you ever loved a woman, then have her find out you fucked a whore from Chicago and then marry that whore to prove that she's not a whore, even though she very obviously is, and then accidentally get her shot in the back by an angry drugdealer and have her die on top of you while still wearing her wedding dress?
Cajun: No thats never happened to me, that is some fucked up shit. Frank is a hard man.
Here is a rundown of what I watched in the film:
-A woman breaks down and pleads for Frank to love her because she worships him and will do anything for him. Frank pauses, and then asks her to clean up the house (So he can invite more women over)
-Dean Martin gets stabbed in the arm after punching some guy out for making fun of his hat at a card game.
-Dean Martin seduces the nurse at the hospital, who is a nun.
- Dean is diagnosed with diabetes at the hospital, and told not to drink. In the very next scene he is drinking whiskey from the bottle in the car and not giving a fuck.
-While in the car, Frank sees a hot woman on the street and immediately stops the car to go over and seduce her. Frank gives the keys to Dean, who is still drinking whiskey from the bottle and now wearing a cowboy hat.
It got kinda fucked up in the end, but holy shit why don't they still make movies like this?
Friday, April 18, 2008
Also the fact that I received about a hundred threatening emails from people that usually consisted of “WHERE THE FUCK IS PART 3, UPDATE YOUR BLOG, STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE! FUCK *Froth* *Froth* *Froth*”
My Reply to all of you is simply:
“Fuck you! I will update my blog…right after this drink!”
Unfortunately, that drink has lasted about the last 4 weeks. Whoops!
Actually the real reason behind the delay is because I’ve been so damn busy. I’ve spent the last 4 weeks pretty much traveling all over the US teaching personalized lessons to all of you! I haven’t got a laptop yet either (Savin up!) so my internet access has been sporadic. Anyways, I’m back now for 2 weeks before I start teaching like crazy again so I’ll try to pump a few good entries over the break, starting with this one!
*Early 90’s infomercial music*
BODY LANGUAGE PART 3 scrolling up
“Aura & Mystique” Fades in
Alright, so in the past 2 articles I’ve gone over how to exude sexual presence, alpha behaviour, and restraint using only your body language. Ok great, it’s been 3 months, so now you can compete with the naturals right? Damn right you can! But unfortunately for you, once you’re at this level naturals start appearing much, much more and if you’re going to stand out from even them, then you’re going to need something that only the TOP seducers throughout history have mastered…
Aura & Mystique.
So what is it?
Aura and mystique is achieved by communicating to women, through non-verbal communication, that you are a man of exceptionally rare quality.
That’s the most logical way I can explain it if I was to define it. I came across this quality while reading about the great seducers; Casanova, Don Juan, Cleopatra, and Rudolf Valentino, they all were described by their lovers as “having an aura” or “Sense of mystique”. So how did they do it? How did they communicate that quality to their lovers? Well, all of the great seducers have their own unique way of displaying this quality.
Casanova would be very clear and open with his sexual intent. He would act on this intent without reserve, and communicate to women that he was simply in love with the act of love.
Cleopatra used her ingenuity and theatrics to seduce. She would plan complex entrances and stage theatrics in order to immortalize herself in the minds of her lovers.
Rudolf Valentino was overtly sexual with his movements, especially his eyes, and seduced millions by the wanton way in which he treated the heroines in his films, something very out of the ordinary for the time.
These are just a few examples, and as you study more and more seducers you find that every one of them have their own special way of standing out from the competition of the time.
So how do we take these lessons in the history of seduction and apply it to our current day interactions?
Advanced Body Language – Aura & Mystique
1. Dress the part.
All of the above seducers dressed in a way that stood out from the competition. Some were astonishingly flashy, some quite unremarkable for today’s standards (An open shirt anyone?)
I’m not going to lie; pea cocking makes a huge difference in how you’re perceived. The trick that most people don’t get (And the main reason you often see at least 1 awkward looking guy wearing a fur hat and eyeliner in any given bar) is that pea cocking only makes you LOOK LIKE someone with mystique, it does not GIVE YOU IT. As well, how you’re dressed and how you act have to be in line with each other (congruency) otherwise you’re going to look like a fake and get blown out or even made fun of. You can’t dress like Mystery without a reason or a personality that goes along with it. Cleopatra wanted people to think she was divine, Rudolf wore tight pants and exposed chests for sex appeal. I have long hair, tight pants, dress in black and leather because I play the villain, so I make sure to dress the part. Figure out who you are and then dress in a slightly stylized version of that. If you’re confused as to *who* you are, identity is something we go over in our seminars (and 1on1s) so if you’ve taken one, you should already know.
2. Make an entrance!
This isn’t as hard as it sounds; don’t worry about staging something extravagant, often, the simpler it is, the better. Your “entrance” basically amounts to a first impression. I’ve actually started asking the women I’ve been with when it was when they realized they were attracted to me, and nearly all of them say something similar, which has given me some insight into how powerful first impressions can be. Here is an actual transcript from a recent one:
Cajun: *Above question*
Rachel: Oh right away.
Cajun: Really? I’m not *that* attractive.
Rachel: No no, it wasn’t that, it was just like you were this funny guy who didn’t give a shit, and I remember looking at you and thinking “He’s a *bad* one!” and then as soon as I thought that, you looked at me…
Rachel: Haha shut up! Actually, the way you looked at me was pretty intense too.
Rachel: Most guys just smile, or get nervous and look away when I notice them, you locked eyes with me and smirked like you knew that I was thinking dirty thoughts about you or something, even though I wasn’t!
Cajun: Yes you were, don’t lie.
Rachel: I wasn’t! But after you did that it’s all I could think about! That’s why I introduced myself a little later, I *had* to meet you.
The above was a girl I met at a party. And my “entrance”, as you can see, was simply a look. My clothes and body language got her attention, but it was the “look” that made the impression on her. Here’s another transcript:
Cajun: *same question*
Isabelle: When you walked up to me.
Cajun: It was a sexy walk?
Isabelle: No, I just noticed you in the bar and you looked over at me and smirked, I thought “Ehh..he’s ok looking” but then you furrowed your eyes like you knew what I was thinking and without looking away you slowly walked over to me and said something really sexy, guys NEVER do that.
Cajun: Do you remember what I said?
Isabelle: Something like “You can’t look at me like that” but it wasn’t what you said, you gave off this confidence, like I remember feeling that even if I wanted to reject you it wouldn’t even have worked, it was weird, but sexy weird. When you left, my friends were like “Who the fuck was THAT guy?” You made a pretty good impression.
The way that I opened this woman was the same way I open every woman that looks at me in a bar. Goes like this:
Girl looks at me
I look at her, HOLD eye contact.
If she holds for more than 2-3 seconds I walk over slowly without looking away.
I get in close and in the most seductive voice I can muster I say “You can’t look at me like that and not say anything”
One of the most important elements here is the *way* that you look at the women. This is hard to explain in text, and I’d post a picture of the look but it wouldn’t help too much because it’s not really the look itself that’s important, but the message the look gives. Essentially you should be looking at them like “I get a funny joke that you don’t get”. That’s the easiest way I can explain it. Couple that with a few glances at their lips and some flirty kino and you have yourself a recipe for a sexy first impression.
3. Don’t give a shit.
Not giving a shit is one of the easiest ways to stand out from nearly every other guy that has approached your sets in the past. The reason is simple; most guys care what women think of them. This is actually a pretty unattractive trait, I don’t think women would admit it, but it is. It says a bunch of negative things which you don’t really need to know other than “they’re bad”. I’m assuming all of you care what women think of you when you approach, that’s ok, you can’t really just turn that off, the trick is to convince the women that you don’t give a shit, not yourself, at least initially. So how do you do it?
- SMILE: Not one of those “Look how happy I am!” grins, keep it cool, it should be a “I know exactly what I’m doing, and you can’t rattle me” type of grin. As well, whenever you don’t know what to say, just smile and look at them like you get something they don’t get. I mentioned this earlier and it’s probably one of the most powerful looks you can give. Practice it until you get it right, it’s a little different for everyone.
- SLOW DOWN: Don’t talk so fast, and try to pause for no reason often, followed by one of those smiles you’ve been practicing. If they ask you a question look at them and smile for a second or two before responding, as if they just asked a dirty question.
- LOOK COMFORTABLE: This pretty much comes down to locking in. Think about where you want to be locked in as you’re approaching the sets. Every good bar is set up in a way that there should always be something to lean on or sit on, so there are no excuses. I have actually leaned on PEOPLE in the past when there was nothing to lean on.
And the last most important rule for aura & mystique
4. Have complete confidence in your mastery of social interactions.
You should seem like someone who could never be uncomfortable, no matter what the situation. If something happens and you don’t know what to say just look comfortable and smile or make fun of the fact that its awkward and blame it on them. Always appear as if you’re one step ahead of everyone., be James Bond.
Alright guys, I’ll try to get Vegas parts 2 & 3 up before the end of next week, so stay tuned!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Hey guys sorry for such a long delay between posts, I’ve been busy with some scary shit the past couple weeks. Anyways, so the
Oh, and just to build a little hype, here are the 3 stories Synopses:
The Silent Challenge: Dahunter and Cajun play a friendly challenge involving them only allowed to speak 3 words to women. Cajun gets drunk and takes the game too seriously.
Ballin!: Cajun somehow gets his group bottle service and passed a $10,000 cover to party with Kanye West and Swedish models in Tryst. Feat: Breakdown of me picking up one of said models.
Our Darkest Secret: Mr. M and Sheriff murder an overweight 57 year old hooker and bury her in the desert…and get away with it. Hilarity ensues, whoops!
Strippers + Game = Profit?: Cajun plays hot potato stripper. What!?
So here is part 1 of the series. I’ll post 2 and 3 a couple days apart.
The Silent Challenge:
One of the coolest things about the super conference was that I got to meet a lot of the other guys in the company that I hadn’t had the chance to work with yet. One of these guys was Dahunter, who I had been told was a really chill guy with amazing body language, and being a self proclaimed master at body language myself, I was very excited to meet him.
Tenmagnet on Dahunter:
“The guy is so chill and relaxed it looks like he’s going to fall over.”
Dahunter didn’t disappoint, and after hanging out with him for the better part of the weekend (He was on my in-field team) I realized that our style was very similar. Me and Dahunter got drunk on one of our off nights and decided to play a game in which we were only allowed to say 3 words to any girl we meet, and see how far we could get just using our body language.
We all end up going out to the playboy club that night and
andonce we get to the bar I order a beer and start trying to think of word combinations I can use. I spot a group of girls near the end of the bar and try a run at our game:
Girl1: Hahaha well this is Vegas, so you’re right at home!
*Cajun furrows his eyebrows, and leans into a locked in position next to girl 1*
Girl 2: So what’s your name?
Knowing I cant speak, and refusing to play “charades”, I simply drink my bottle of beer continuously and point to it as if it’s the reason I can’t talk.
Girl1: Why won’t you talk to us?
*Cajun pulls out a pen and a piece of paper and writes:*
*Hands note to girls*
Girls walk away.
I laugh to myself and realize that indirect game will be impossible with these rules. But I decide to try it a couple more times before I break out the direct game. I spot a group of scantily dressed women facing the bar and try my luck again. I order a drink next to them, switch around so my back is to the bar and then look at the one farthest from me and say:
Cajun: You love…Phil Collins. (Names count as 1 word!)
*Woman turns around and she’s obviously in her early 40’s, but not bad looking*
Woman1: Oh I love Phil Collins!
Cajun: *makes disgusted face*
*Woman 2 now turns around and is about the same age, they both immediately begin touching me and displaying other “cougar-esque” behavior.*
Being a veteran of in field game, I know that the one thing that you never want to do is tease a cougar, because if you tease a cougar you get bit. Realizing that if I play the silent challenge they will take it as some sort of sick flirting game and that Vegas cougars are probably twice as aggressive as Canadian cougars, I decide that I will pass on spending my first night in Vegas being mauled by a couple of cougs...until I get drunker.
Cajun (Cont’d): Hey sorry guys, the fact that you love Phil Collins makes it impossible for me to respect you, and I’m old enough to be your father.
Cougs: Ahahah oh you're so cute!
Cajun: I'll come talk to you wildcats after a couple more drinks.
Cougs: Wait, what?
I walk away.
Did I mention I was getting drunk at this point?
The thing with me when I drink is that for some reason my game actually improves…up to a certain point obviously. I tend to be more of an ass, so really confident girls tend to be easier, low self-esteem girls however tend to hate me. At this point I was at the sweet spot in my drunkenness where I was bold enough to confidently escalate immediately yet still sober enough to not accidentally hit on ugly girls.
I walk to the elevators, passing through the dance floor and casually making out with 2 different girls as I “Jagger” my way through. I get into the elevator with 2 playboy bunnies (We were at Playboy club at this point) and say:
Cajun: Guys, I’m famous and I need to make an impressive exit out of the club, here…
*I stick my arms out for them to grab, they do*
Bunny2: Are you a musician? (I dressed like one that night)
Cajun: Alright ladies, get ready for cameras and a mob…
*The doors open and we walk out arm in arm in front of the long line to get in. A couple guys cheer and whoo!”
Bunny1: Where are we going?
Cajun: Right here.
*I sit down at one of the nickel machines, put a coin in, and pull the lever*
Cajun: Can you get me a gin and tonic?
Bunnies: Ahahahah you’re hilarious.
Cajun: What time do you guys get off?
Bunniy2: Wow, very smooth. .
Cajun: Alright, meet me here, see ya!
Bunnies: See ya!
I get up and walk towards the blackjack tables, I see Mr. M on his cell and he runs over to me.
Mr. M: Dude where you been? Everyone is at Hardrock.
Cajun: Fuck (something incoherent about playboy bunnies) lets go!
We go to Hardrock and meet up with Tenmagnet and some of the other guys. This is the point at which I pass through my “optimal drunk” point and into my “Everyone starts to look sexy” period of drunkenness. Here is what happened as explained through the next morning over breakfast:
Tenmagnet: So who won in your game with Dahunter last night?
Cajun: I don’t know, I didn’t see Dahunter after Playboy but I did amazing!
Tenmagnet: Dude, when I saw you at hardrock last night you were just walking up to women, sort of sneering at them, and then you’d start making out with them.
Cajun: Fuck awesome!
Tenmagnet: No, not awesome dude! We were at Hardrock at , the only girls there were hookers and fat chicks. Here I took some pictures!
*Tenmagnet shows me a picture of me kissing a really pale chubby girl*
Cajun: (taken aback) OH FUCK! Why did you take me there!
To my credit Tenmagnet really only took a picture of the ugliest girl I managed to kiss that night, ignoring the seemingly dozens of potential 6’s and 7’s (hookers) that seem to populate the Hardrock after hours.
Dahunter and some of the other instructors join us for breakfast and I ask Dahunter about his night.
Cajun: Dude did you try our challenge?
Dahunter: Ahhh fuck no I kind of forgot about it, how did it go for you?
I get a fuzzy flashback of a woman at hardrock who’s lips were so big and fake that she reminded me of a clam with hair, I then realize that in my state last night I probably would have found her “clamish” features attractive.
Cajun: Haha I don’t want to talk about it, fucking Vegas.
I take a big gulp of my bloody mary praying that the double shot of vodka cauterizes all the skin in my skanky mouth.
Stay tuned for part 2 of The Vegas files: Ballin!
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Although I stopped caring about dance floor game a long time ago, Jaggering became an inside joke between me and my friends and I still, to this day, Jagger the shit out of things whenever I feel like looking like an idiot...which is often. If you watch closely you can see a couple "Jaggers" in the Keys video.
I actually watched every Rolling Stones video I could get my hands on and found about 5-6 recognizable "moves" that he does consistently, then practiced them, yes I'm a pro. The funny thing was that, in terms of attracting women on the dance floor, it was surprisingly consistent when done in a mocking fashion. (Tip: For best results try using on cougars)
Anyways, so me and Tenmagnet (who is totally into the Jaggering) were doing the seminar in NYC this past weekend and we saw this video on youtube about 2 guys challenging each other to "Do their best Jagger" at inappropriate times. At first I was pissed that someone stole my idea of Jaggering, but then I realized how awesome of a game it would be for the bar. Me and Tenmagnet mapped out some rules:
1. If at any time the words "Do your best Jagger" are communicated to you by your challenger (whether by speech, text, or silently mouthing) you must do no less than 3 signature Jagger dance moves, immediately. This means stopping whatever you are doing, without explanation, and performing the moves within 3 seconds of being challenged.
Additional: If you are talking to a girl when challenged, you must speak the words "Cause shes a biiitch..." while doing a Jagger hand flourish. It must look really gay.
2. Failure to perform said Jagger dance moves results in your acceptance to down a shot of whatever your challenger decides to get you. This shot will be hand delivered and presented to you as "Your favourite" and will more often than not contain liquor(s) that you find personally "fucking gross!" Obvious examples include: Dry vermouth, cheap Tequila, Bailey's & lime etc.
3. There is no limit to the number of times you may challenge your opponent, however, If at any time you feel as if your challenger is abusing this rule, you may have a "Jagger off". During a Jagger off you must both perform no less than 4 Jaggers along with your own signature "Jagger Swagger" that must be improvised on the spot. A panel of no less than 3 spectators must judge the winner, who receives challenge immunity for 2 hours as well as a shot of his choice.
So me and Tenmagnet were playing this pretty much the entire weekend. We would try to challenge each other at the most inappropriate times. Highlights include:
Tenmagnet Jaggering in front of a bunch of little kids who were outside their rehearsal space where we had the seminar.
Me Jaggering in Times Square
Both of us Jaggering our respected sets at an upscale bar in Manhatten, not getting blown out.
Me opening a set with a Jagger.
Tenmagnet improvising some David Lee Roth into his Jaggering and performing a mid-Jagger jump kick.
But the funniest one for me would have to be...
On sat night I went home with an actress I had met earlier. We were making out on her bed when I got a text, usually I would ignore it but I thought it might be Tenmag locked out or something so I checked it:
Tenmagnet says: "Do your best Jagger!"
Fuck! I close the phone and get up off the bed.
Girl: What are you doing?
**Cajun starts dancing around the bed, doing the rooster walk, and making the "Ooo oo OOOhoo oohOO" noise from the song "miss you".**
Girl: What the FUCK was that?
Cajun: Nothing, just my mating ritual.
Girl: God you're weird.
THE LAST RULE OF JAGGER CLUB IS YOU NEVER TALK ABOUT JAGGER CLUB!
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Cajun: Hey I want a kitten.
Guy: Ok do you know which one?
Cajun: Well, just give me the biggest asshole you have.
Cajun: He has to kill mice, like just murder the shit out of them. Do you have any kittens that are aggressive?
Guy: We just got this black kitten named Jet, whenever we take him out of the cage he acts like a panther and hunts people. He's pretty aggressive.
He takes me over to "Jet" and he's a completely black tiny kitten with bright green eyes and a look on his face that says "fuck.....off", he is a bad ass. I picked him up, examined him like I knew what I was doing then scratched under his chin, he purrs and makes this noise like an Ewok that I found entertaining, so I took him home.
Here's the conversation I had with my roommate as to what I should name him:
Faxe: What are you gonna name him?
Cajun: I don't know, I hate cats.
Faxe: Well then you should name him something dumb.
Cajun: Haha, yeah hmmm.
Faxe: Whats the one name you would hate to have if you were a cat?
Cajun: I got it! His name will be Rod Stewart!
*Rod Stewart bites my leg*
Cajun: Fuck! that confirms it, what an asshole!
Rod Stewart turned out to be exactly what I asked for; a fucking asshole. Now I say that as a term of endearment, I actually like assholes, being one myself. He attacks people when they're not looking, often hiding behind objects and jumping out at the last second, he holds grudges and will attack and bite without warning, often for no reason (Just ask Sinn and Tenmagnet haha).
The cool thing I'm learning about cats is that they communicate almost exclusively with body language. It's actually made me more aware of my body language and has helped me out in the field since I can't turn off my "alpha" anymore without Rod challenging and biting me. It's gotten to the point now that I can look at him a certain way and he submits, pretty cool.
Anyways, besides biting and being a shit head he's also an amazing cockblock. I think just about every girl I've brought home since I've gotten him has been allergic to cats. It's really annoying, I swear its like 90% of women are allergic to cats or something. Thats not even the worst part either, lately I think Rod has become pissed at the fact that I always kick him out of my room when I have girls over, he's started hiding in my room when he hears me coming up the stairs with a girl, he's really devoted to being a master sneak. Anyways, I brought this girl home the other night and we came into my room where I immediately began searching for Rod...
Girl: What are you doing? (I didn't tell her I have a cat as I simply assume all women are allergic at this point)
Cajun: Uhh nothing, I think I dropped something earlier, nevermind.
Content, I assume Rod is somewhere else in the house so I close the door and get down to business. I put some music on from my computer. We start making out on the bed and things progress quickly. Unexpectedly, "Motown Song" by Rod Stewart starts playing. You see, me and my roommate have this prank called "Audio shaming" where we put really shitty songs on each other's play lists to embarrass each other when girls come over.
girl: *lifting her head from the depths of the pillow* What is it?
Cajun: I hate this song, my room mate put this on just to bug me.
Girl: Its ok, don't stop, I like this song. *buries head back into pillow to muffle her throes of passion*
Cajun: *Makes disgusted face*
Just then I see Rod's head creeping up from the end of the bed like an assassin emerging from the shadows, he notices that I see him and freezes. Even in the dark I can see that his eyes are completely black, which means he's in stalking mode, and up to no good.
Cajun: *in an angry whisper* Rod, don't you fucking dare!
*Rods head slowly submerges below my sight* (he hates being caught when he's stalking you)
I continue for about 30 seconds until I see his head slowly emerge from behind the bed again. He looks pissed, and getting ready to pounce.
Cajun: *loud whisper* Rod Stewart, fucking DON'T!
Almost on cue with the crescendo of the music Rod jumps on the girl's back and bites her ass.
Girl: AHHHHHHH What the fuck!
Rod scurries away onto the floor and triumphantly makes his cooing Ewok noise seemingly in tune with the "Woooo oooo wooo oowoo!" of the shitty Rod Stewart song playing.
I fall over laughing.
Girl: Fuck! Was that a cat!?
Cajun: Yeah, Rod Stewart.
Girl: Rod Stewart is a DICK.
Cajun: I KNOW!
Of course she's allergic to cats and the scratches on her back puff up and become really itchy, not to mention her getting a stuffy nose and watery eyes. She gets dressed and calls herself a cab.
Chalk up another win for Rod Stewart...that fucking asshole.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Advanced Body Language – Part 2: Restraint
Hey guys, this is part 2 of a 3 part series I’ve written on advanced body language. You can read part 1 below. And for those of you who wish to see some visual examples of what I’m talking about you can watch the video of me I’ve linked below (My keys episode).
In the last article I mentioned that, after systematically analyzing the shit out of the most prolific sexual icons in history, I managed to nail down a formula of how to move in a way that exudes many of the qualities humans (that’s women AND men) go crazy for. The first quality I explained was sexual presence, and if you’ve followed and practiced what I said then you should now have no trouble successfully approaching (and being approached by) the most beautiful women in the venue without getting blown out. But that is just the beginning and you now have a new challenge to undertake; how do you rise above the inevitable onslaught of shit tests and cockblocks?
John Bonham was the greatest drummer who ever lived. Most people, critics and fans alike, would agree with that statement. However, if you ask people why he was the greatest drummer of all time then the answers start to become a little convoluted. Keith Moon could hit just as hard, and his style and timing were equally (if not more so) groundbreaking. What sets Bonzo apart from all the other great drummers past and present? The answer, of course, is the very subject of this article.
John Bonham was the greatest drummer of all time because of his ability to show tremendous restraint. It was Bonzo’s ability to hold back that made him so attractive as a drummer. Just when you thought he was going as hard as he could, he would go harder… and then harder again, his unpredictability became legendary. He would tackle the most complex rhythms with such ease and panache that you would start to question whether or not there was any limit to his ability. John Bonham never showed his limits.
Restraint, in the context of seduction, is never showing your limits. Overcoming challenges with the least visible effort, but doing so in a way that hints at something much greater. How does this relate to body language? Well, it works the same way; less is more. Once you grasp the nuances of the most subtle physical reactions things become much, much easier. I’ll give you an example.
Put yourself in this situation
You are walking home from the bar one night alone. Up ahead you see a group of 2 rough looking guys who seem to be out to cause trouble. You walk by and they begin verbally assaulting you, you keep walking until they say “Hey you fucking fagot! Look at me when I talk to you!”
The coward will run away.
The confident man will match their aggression with his own, and hope that his hand is stronger.
The ideal man, that is, the man who has complete control, will do neither. The ideal man will simply turn around and give the 2 men a look. That look, in all its simplicity, will communicate so much more than any words could possibly achieve. Understand that when men show aggression it’s always reaction seeking. They want a reaction because they need to gauge your limit, they want to read your hand. If you ever watch 2 male lions fighting you will notice something similar;
Before the fight, the beta lion will be just outside the alpha lion’s comfort zone and will begin threatening the alpha lion with roars and turning it’s head sideways to show off it’s teeth. The alpha lion will simply stand there and watch the beta lion. No amount of aggression on the beta lion’s part will affect the alpha lion in any way, he is a rock. If the beta lion moves forward, so does the alpha lion, even more so and without delay. What happens? Unless the beta lion has strength in numbers he will almost always accept defeat, even if he is much bigger than the alpha lion. If the alpha lion shows any sort of reaction to the beta’s aggression then they will almost always fight.
So how does all of this translate out in the field?
Advanced Body Language: Restraint
- The simple most subtle reactions are the best.
If you get shit tested hard (ie “why are you talking to us!?”) the best reaction is to not say a word. Simply smile, raise your eyebrows and cock your head back as if a 4 year old just challenged you to a fight in the most verbally insulting (and hilarious) way possible. If she admits defeat with her body language (she will look uncomfortable and not know what to say next) then you need to reward her, kino her and say “You have a lot of confidence, I like that”
- Make them show their hand first.
Often, when someone has the confidence to make a threat to someone whose limits they don’t know, they rarely have the confidence to do it twice. So, if a persistent Amog says something insulting like “Uhh dude these girls think you’re gay, you should leave” Simply smile confidently and without missing a beat say “Excuse me?!” then immediately look at the girls with eye code that says “is this guy an idiot?” Look back at the guy in a way that demands a reaction from him. His only option will be to ante up the aggression, in which case, read on…
- Actively encourage challengers
Nothing is more frightening to a man than an opponent who actively seeks, and seems to enjoy aggression thrown at him. Be confident in your ability to rise above, always remain calm, cool and collected. An unreactive man is a man who cannot be read, and therefore cannot be beaten.
Amog: “Don’t listen to this guy, he sounds like a fucking idiot”
You: *Big smile* “Im sorry, did you just call me a FUCKING IDIOT?” Hold eye contact, actively expect a response. If he maintains his frame, read on…
- Never admit defeat
Never secede from their advances. Always make them ante up their aggression. If it gets to the point where you think they are going to make a scene (which rarely EVER happens) then simply smile, pat them on the back and say “You’re cool dude, you got a lot of confidence, I respect that” this will actually make people like you MORE. True alpha males respect other men who can stand up against them, the same is true for women. This is why you should NEVER admit defeat, take them as far as they can go then respect them for it, everybody wins.
Now that you have the body language of a rock star, and the confidence (through restraint) of an 800lb gorilla you should have no problem getting the girl right?
Actually, there’s still one piece missing from the puzzle, and it’s the most important piece.
With the advice I have given you so far you should be able to successfully sarge just about any set, and attract just about any woman, but this is advanced body language! There must be more! How do you go about attracting anyone, and I mean anyone! There is more to physical attraction than sexual presence and restraint, the third quality separates the players from the Legends. What secret did Don Juan, Cleopatra, and Casanova employ to make them so irresistible?
Stay tuned for part 3 where I go over the third quality: Aura and Mystique.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Whenever students ask me how I learned to attract women with such ease I always say the same thing: Body language. I then recite a quote, something that was told to me a long time ago:
“Everything you’ll ever need to learn about women, you can learn from Rock n roll.”
A very wise man once told me this and I’m sure most of my students are just as confused as I was when I first heard it, but now several years (and many women) later I can whole-heartedly agree, it’s absolutely true.
One of the by-products of committing yourself to the study of attraction and how it works is that you start noticing things that you never noticed before. A lot of us instructors refer to this as “seeing the matrix” and it basically amounts to identifying and understanding the cause and effect of the most subtle communications; body language. It becomes somewhat of a sixth sense and it’s exceptionally difficult to turn off, especially if you’re at all an analytical person (and let’s face it, you kind of have to be if you want to get good at this stuff) This is why us instructors are so proficient at breaking down what students did right or wrong in a set simply by casually observing them. We can see the matrix.
I realized a long time ago that the secret to attraction isn’t in what you say, it’s in how you carry yourself; your presence, something controlled almost entirely by your body language. I knew that if I was to master the art of attraction, I would need to master the art of body language. Remembering the words of wisdom I had been told all those years ago, I turned to rock n roll.
I began sifting through literally hundreds of videos documenting performances of the most prolific and sexually charged rock icons in music history. I used my “sixth sense” to meticulously analyze every thing they did. I studied how they walked, how they danced, their facial expressions, even how they stood still! I started to notice a pattern, there were three qualities that nearly every sex symbol in the history of rock n roll all had in common, and it had nothing to do with their music or looks.
The first quality I recognized was immediate; sexual presence. Most of the musicians elicited this through their dancing, which wasn’t that useful since I obviously couldn’t be dancing all the time. The absolute best example of sexual presence I could find was Jim Morrison simply because he elicited tremendous sexual presence by doing very little. I hadn’t watched any videos of him performing since I was a teenager and seeing it again with my “sixth sense” absolutely blew my mind. He moved slowly, purposefully, as if to poeticize his presence. Everything seemed so calculated. After referencing what he did with a number of other sexual icons, I quickly made a list:
Advanced body language – Sexual Presence
- Less is more.
- Move only when you need to, and react with delay.
- Slow down your movements, as if moving underwater.
- Movement should be bold, sporadic and purposeful.
2. Poeticize your presence.
- Absolutely believe that you are a spectacle to be witnessed.
- Draw attention to your every move with strong eye contact, and delayed responses.
- Always appear physically more comfortable than anyone else in the group. Lean back when standing, angle back and drape your arms when sitting.
- Your demeanor should be carefree, content; you do not want or need anything.
3. Emphasize your sexuality
- Relax your eyes. Look at Jim Morrison, Phil Lynott or even Marilyn Monroe, their eyes all carry the same look, model it.
- Slightly Purse your lips, as if you’re about to kiss them.
- Slightly tilt your head up and look down when speaking.
- Slowly study women’s faces during interaction, glance at lips periodically.
- Keep an inquisitory look of mild arousal on your face.
I began modeling my body language based on this list and the results were epic. This is the reason I stopped using routines, I no longer needed them. Everything they communicated I could now communicate with my body. Even openers started to become unnecessary as women were now opening ME more than ever, based simply on the way I stood and the look on my face. Attraction went from slowly earned to instantaneous, but there were still some gaps…
Stay tuned for part 2 of the article where I go over the second quality: Restraint.