Thursday, January 31, 2008
Cajun: Hey I want a kitten.
Guy: Ok do you know which one?
Cajun: Well, just give me the biggest asshole you have.
Cajun: He has to kill mice, like just murder the shit out of them. Do you have any kittens that are aggressive?
Guy: We just got this black kitten named Jet, whenever we take him out of the cage he acts like a panther and hunts people. He's pretty aggressive.
He takes me over to "Jet" and he's a completely black tiny kitten with bright green eyes and a look on his face that says "fuck.....off", he is a bad ass. I picked him up, examined him like I knew what I was doing then scratched under his chin, he purrs and makes this noise like an Ewok that I found entertaining, so I took him home.
Here's the conversation I had with my roommate as to what I should name him:
Faxe: What are you gonna name him?
Cajun: I don't know, I hate cats.
Faxe: Well then you should name him something dumb.
Cajun: Haha, yeah hmmm.
Faxe: Whats the one name you would hate to have if you were a cat?
Cajun: I got it! His name will be Rod Stewart!
*Rod Stewart bites my leg*
Cajun: Fuck! that confirms it, what an asshole!
Rod Stewart turned out to be exactly what I asked for; a fucking asshole. Now I say that as a term of endearment, I actually like assholes, being one myself. He attacks people when they're not looking, often hiding behind objects and jumping out at the last second, he holds grudges and will attack and bite without warning, often for no reason (Just ask Sinn and Tenmagnet haha).
The cool thing I'm learning about cats is that they communicate almost exclusively with body language. It's actually made me more aware of my body language and has helped me out in the field since I can't turn off my "alpha" anymore without Rod challenging and biting me. It's gotten to the point now that I can look at him a certain way and he submits, pretty cool.
Anyways, besides biting and being a shit head he's also an amazing cockblock. I think just about every girl I've brought home since I've gotten him has been allergic to cats. It's really annoying, I swear its like 90% of women are allergic to cats or something. Thats not even the worst part either, lately I think Rod has become pissed at the fact that I always kick him out of my room when I have girls over, he's started hiding in my room when he hears me coming up the stairs with a girl, he's really devoted to being a master sneak. Anyways, I brought this girl home the other night and we came into my room where I immediately began searching for Rod...
Girl: What are you doing? (I didn't tell her I have a cat as I simply assume all women are allergic at this point)
Cajun: Uhh nothing, I think I dropped something earlier, nevermind.
Content, I assume Rod is somewhere else in the house so I close the door and get down to business. I put some music on from my computer. We start making out on the bed and things progress quickly. Unexpectedly, "Motown Song" by Rod Stewart starts playing. You see, me and my roommate have this prank called "Audio shaming" where we put really shitty songs on each other's play lists to embarrass each other when girls come over.
girl: *lifting her head from the depths of the pillow* What is it?
Cajun: I hate this song, my room mate put this on just to bug me.
Girl: Its ok, don't stop, I like this song. *buries head back into pillow to muffle her throes of passion*
Cajun: *Makes disgusted face*
Just then I see Rod's head creeping up from the end of the bed like an assassin emerging from the shadows, he notices that I see him and freezes. Even in the dark I can see that his eyes are completely black, which means he's in stalking mode, and up to no good.
Cajun: *in an angry whisper* Rod, don't you fucking dare!
*Rods head slowly submerges below my sight* (he hates being caught when he's stalking you)
I continue for about 30 seconds until I see his head slowly emerge from behind the bed again. He looks pissed, and getting ready to pounce.
Cajun: *loud whisper* Rod Stewart, fucking DON'T!
Almost on cue with the crescendo of the music Rod jumps on the girl's back and bites her ass.
Girl: AHHHHHHH What the fuck!
Rod scurries away onto the floor and triumphantly makes his cooing Ewok noise seemingly in tune with the "Woooo oooo wooo oowoo!" of the shitty Rod Stewart song playing.
I fall over laughing.
Girl: Fuck! Was that a cat!?
Cajun: Yeah, Rod Stewart.
Girl: Rod Stewart is a DICK.
Cajun: I KNOW!
Of course she's allergic to cats and the scratches on her back puff up and become really itchy, not to mention her getting a stuffy nose and watery eyes. She gets dressed and calls herself a cab.
Chalk up another win for Rod Stewart...that fucking asshole.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Advanced Body Language – Part 2: Restraint
Hey guys, this is part 2 of a 3 part series I’ve written on advanced body language. You can read part 1 below. And for those of you who wish to see some visual examples of what I’m talking about you can watch the video of me I’ve linked below (My keys episode).
In the last article I mentioned that, after systematically analyzing the shit out of the most prolific sexual icons in history, I managed to nail down a formula of how to move in a way that exudes many of the qualities humans (that’s women AND men) go crazy for. The first quality I explained was sexual presence, and if you’ve followed and practiced what I said then you should now have no trouble successfully approaching (and being approached by) the most beautiful women in the venue without getting blown out. But that is just the beginning and you now have a new challenge to undertake; how do you rise above the inevitable onslaught of shit tests and cockblocks?
John Bonham was the greatest drummer who ever lived. Most people, critics and fans alike, would agree with that statement. However, if you ask people why he was the greatest drummer of all time then the answers start to become a little convoluted. Keith Moon could hit just as hard, and his style and timing were equally (if not more so) groundbreaking. What sets Bonzo apart from all the other great drummers past and present? The answer, of course, is the very subject of this article.
John Bonham was the greatest drummer of all time because of his ability to show tremendous restraint. It was Bonzo’s ability to hold back that made him so attractive as a drummer. Just when you thought he was going as hard as he could, he would go harder… and then harder again, his unpredictability became legendary. He would tackle the most complex rhythms with such ease and panache that you would start to question whether or not there was any limit to his ability. John Bonham never showed his limits.
Restraint, in the context of seduction, is never showing your limits. Overcoming challenges with the least visible effort, but doing so in a way that hints at something much greater. How does this relate to body language? Well, it works the same way; less is more. Once you grasp the nuances of the most subtle physical reactions things become much, much easier. I’ll give you an example.
Put yourself in this situation
You are walking home from the bar one night alone. Up ahead you see a group of 2 rough looking guys who seem to be out to cause trouble. You walk by and they begin verbally assaulting you, you keep walking until they say “Hey you fucking fagot! Look at me when I talk to you!”
The coward will run away.
The confident man will match their aggression with his own, and hope that his hand is stronger.
The ideal man, that is, the man who has complete control, will do neither. The ideal man will simply turn around and give the 2 men a look. That look, in all its simplicity, will communicate so much more than any words could possibly achieve. Understand that when men show aggression it’s always reaction seeking. They want a reaction because they need to gauge your limit, they want to read your hand. If you ever watch 2 male lions fighting you will notice something similar;
Before the fight, the beta lion will be just outside the alpha lion’s comfort zone and will begin threatening the alpha lion with roars and turning it’s head sideways to show off it’s teeth. The alpha lion will simply stand there and watch the beta lion. No amount of aggression on the beta lion’s part will affect the alpha lion in any way, he is a rock. If the beta lion moves forward, so does the alpha lion, even more so and without delay. What happens? Unless the beta lion has strength in numbers he will almost always accept defeat, even if he is much bigger than the alpha lion. If the alpha lion shows any sort of reaction to the beta’s aggression then they will almost always fight.
So how does all of this translate out in the field?
Advanced Body Language: Restraint
- The simple most subtle reactions are the best.
If you get shit tested hard (ie “why are you talking to us!?”) the best reaction is to not say a word. Simply smile, raise your eyebrows and cock your head back as if a 4 year old just challenged you to a fight in the most verbally insulting (and hilarious) way possible. If she admits defeat with her body language (she will look uncomfortable and not know what to say next) then you need to reward her, kino her and say “You have a lot of confidence, I like that”
- Make them show their hand first.
Often, when someone has the confidence to make a threat to someone whose limits they don’t know, they rarely have the confidence to do it twice. So, if a persistent Amog says something insulting like “Uhh dude these girls think you’re gay, you should leave” Simply smile confidently and without missing a beat say “Excuse me?!” then immediately look at the girls with eye code that says “is this guy an idiot?” Look back at the guy in a way that demands a reaction from him. His only option will be to ante up the aggression, in which case, read on…
- Actively encourage challengers
Nothing is more frightening to a man than an opponent who actively seeks, and seems to enjoy aggression thrown at him. Be confident in your ability to rise above, always remain calm, cool and collected. An unreactive man is a man who cannot be read, and therefore cannot be beaten.
Amog: “Don’t listen to this guy, he sounds like a fucking idiot”
You: *Big smile* “Im sorry, did you just call me a FUCKING IDIOT?” Hold eye contact, actively expect a response. If he maintains his frame, read on…
- Never admit defeat
Never secede from their advances. Always make them ante up their aggression. If it gets to the point where you think they are going to make a scene (which rarely EVER happens) then simply smile, pat them on the back and say “You’re cool dude, you got a lot of confidence, I respect that” this will actually make people like you MORE. True alpha males respect other men who can stand up against them, the same is true for women. This is why you should NEVER admit defeat, take them as far as they can go then respect them for it, everybody wins.
Now that you have the body language of a rock star, and the confidence (through restraint) of an 800lb gorilla you should have no problem getting the girl right?
Actually, there’s still one piece missing from the puzzle, and it’s the most important piece.
With the advice I have given you so far you should be able to successfully sarge just about any set, and attract just about any woman, but this is advanced body language! There must be more! How do you go about attracting anyone, and I mean anyone! There is more to physical attraction than sexual presence and restraint, the third quality separates the players from the Legends. What secret did Don Juan, Cleopatra, and Casanova employ to make them so irresistible?
Stay tuned for part 3 where I go over the third quality: Aura and Mystique.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Whenever students ask me how I learned to attract women with such ease I always say the same thing: Body language. I then recite a quote, something that was told to me a long time ago:
“Everything you’ll ever need to learn about women, you can learn from Rock n roll.”
A very wise man once told me this and I’m sure most of my students are just as confused as I was when I first heard it, but now several years (and many women) later I can whole-heartedly agree, it’s absolutely true.
One of the by-products of committing yourself to the study of attraction and how it works is that you start noticing things that you never noticed before. A lot of us instructors refer to this as “seeing the matrix” and it basically amounts to identifying and understanding the cause and effect of the most subtle communications; body language. It becomes somewhat of a sixth sense and it’s exceptionally difficult to turn off, especially if you’re at all an analytical person (and let’s face it, you kind of have to be if you want to get good at this stuff) This is why us instructors are so proficient at breaking down what students did right or wrong in a set simply by casually observing them. We can see the matrix.
I realized a long time ago that the secret to attraction isn’t in what you say, it’s in how you carry yourself; your presence, something controlled almost entirely by your body language. I knew that if I was to master the art of attraction, I would need to master the art of body language. Remembering the words of wisdom I had been told all those years ago, I turned to rock n roll.
I began sifting through literally hundreds of videos documenting performances of the most prolific and sexually charged rock icons in music history. I used my “sixth sense” to meticulously analyze every thing they did. I studied how they walked, how they danced, their facial expressions, even how they stood still! I started to notice a pattern, there were three qualities that nearly every sex symbol in the history of rock n roll all had in common, and it had nothing to do with their music or looks.
The first quality I recognized was immediate; sexual presence. Most of the musicians elicited this through their dancing, which wasn’t that useful since I obviously couldn’t be dancing all the time. The absolute best example of sexual presence I could find was Jim Morrison simply because he elicited tremendous sexual presence by doing very little. I hadn’t watched any videos of him performing since I was a teenager and seeing it again with my “sixth sense” absolutely blew my mind. He moved slowly, purposefully, as if to poeticize his presence. Everything seemed so calculated. After referencing what he did with a number of other sexual icons, I quickly made a list:
Advanced body language – Sexual Presence
- Less is more.
- Move only when you need to, and react with delay.
- Slow down your movements, as if moving underwater.
- Movement should be bold, sporadic and purposeful.
2. Poeticize your presence.
- Absolutely believe that you are a spectacle to be witnessed.
- Draw attention to your every move with strong eye contact, and delayed responses.
- Always appear physically more comfortable than anyone else in the group. Lean back when standing, angle back and drape your arms when sitting.
- Your demeanor should be carefree, content; you do not want or need anything.
3. Emphasize your sexuality
- Relax your eyes. Look at Jim Morrison, Phil Lynott or even Marilyn Monroe, their eyes all carry the same look, model it.
- Slightly Purse your lips, as if you’re about to kiss them.
- Slightly tilt your head up and look down when speaking.
- Slowly study women’s faces during interaction, glance at lips periodically.
- Keep an inquisitory look of mild arousal on your face.
I began modeling my body language based on this list and the results were epic. This is the reason I stopped using routines, I no longer needed them. Everything they communicated I could now communicate with my body. Even openers started to become unnecessary as women were now opening ME more than ever, based simply on the way I stood and the look on my face. Attraction went from slowly earned to instantaneous, but there were still some gaps…
Stay tuned for part 2 of the article where I go over the second quality: Restraint.